One of the most tiring, emotionally draining, and energy-sapping practices that any of us can ever take part in is that of holding on to resentment. Not only does it put you in a lousy state of existence, cause you great stress, and make those around you feel uncomfortable…but it literally drains you of the strength you need to pursue your real passion and make your own life as productive as possible.
I read a great quote the other day. It was about how holding onto hatred or bitterness actually ends up hurting the person doing the hating, as opposed to having any affect whatsoever on the person being hated. Here’s the quote: “Harboring resentment is like allowing someone to live in your head…rent free”. Isn’t that powerful?
It’s kind of a crazy, cosmic twist for indulging in the ultra negative and unproductive, right?
Once again, maybe the most damaging aspect of allowing hate or anger to harbor is that it prevents you from unleashing your true potential and expanding the way you need to in order to be most successful in life.
So the real question becomes, how do you start to let go of this stuff in your every day life?
I want to share an excerpt from an incredible book, written by one of the most inspirational people that I know, Allison Maslan. It speaks to this very topic most effectively. The book is called Blast Off: The Surefire Success Plan to Launch Your Dreams into Reality. Allison has built many business in her career, and has been an extremely successful entrepreneur for the past 25 years. She’s a fantastic person with a heart of gold, and I highly recommend anything that she puts out there! Here is the passage I wanted to share with you:
“Resentment, anger and frustration keep us from moving forward in life. These feelings make sure that we stay connected to the past and to our negative situations and relationships. They can wreak havoc with your health and demeanor and at the same time block any potential for joy. If you want to move toward your potential for success, empowerment and love, you will need to begin to release the pain. In contrast, dwelling on the past will keep you stuck there, and I know you want to make a positive shift in your life. It’s not a simple task to let go, especially when this person or situation creates a trigger or charge in your energy field.
Just remember that the anger or grief you generate and carry regarding someone else will only mirror the same frequency of energy back to you. So rather than hurting them, you are really hurting yourself. Come on already! Haven’t you been through enough?
Take a moment to ask your self the questions below…write down your immediate thoughts that come to mind without censoring them. Be honest with yourself.
*What resentments, anger and grief am I carrying around each day?
*Who am I angry or resentful toward?
*How can I take responsibility for this situation?
*What have I learned from this situation that has been positive toward my growth?
*Can I give myself permission to let go of those negative feelings?
*How do I feel now that this energy-draining emotion is released?
If you have gotten this far, you are definitely ready for change. You are working diligently to release the past and any negative blocks or energy that have held you back. You are letting go of any burdensome weight that could be slowing your progress. Once it is released, you’ll feel like a hundred pounds of grief and stress have melted away. It’s true; you’ll actually feel physically lighter, freer and more present in the moment. And just think about how much more energy you’ll have once you aren’t working so hard to hold onto this negative load.
You may be thinking, how can I just let it go? In actuality, it is much easier to let something go than to hold onto it. Try lifting up something heavy. Feel the effort it takes to keep the object suspended. How much energy does it take for you to grip the object? How many other body parts are involved? Your entire arm, your torso and your legs are probably all affected from this holding on – all in the effort to keep your equilibrium. Now, let it go. You can do it! Simply release your grip. (Please do not drop anything breakable and find a forgiving surface for the fall.)
Which movement took the least effort? Letting go is effortless. The illusion that letting go is hard is only the mental mania that we give it. Holding on is painful and often results in the exact thing we were trying to avoid – more pain! Well, here’s an important truth: When we allow the past to be in the past, we are making room for new positive energy and circumstances to appear.
Now that you have let go of past resentments, your focus can shift to the present and the future. Congratulations… you are in motion again! Moving forward rather than hovering is energizing. The momentum feels productive which, in turn, gives you a sense of accomplishment, This is an uplifting place to be.”
That’s such great stuff, don’t you think? I’m telling you, it’s the kind of book that can change your life!
Allison’s website, where you can access all of her outstanding resources is MyBlastOff.com. You will definitely want to check it out!